Bergen County Let Me Down: Violence against Women Ignored and 4 Women a Day Die

BettyJean Downing Kling

Today as I sat in court awaiting my case I was shocked to see no less than 7 DV cases go unheard because the women did not take the case forward. Whatever happened to the state proceeding without the woman because she may be afraid to testify? I saw officers agree to allow the state to drop the case.
Some abused women came in but said they did not want to proceed, a few called in saying they wanted to drop the charges and some simply did not appear. A parade of men came and went in and out without a care in the world, allegedly having violated the women they are intimate with.
What a horrible shame on two counts. First that the women let these men get away with violating them physically, but what about these punks that hit women and walk in here as if they are not the least bit ashamed of their behavior. I saw one man fondling and kissing her after the court and thanking her- she didn’t look happy about it at all. I saw another woman sitting there looking scared to death and she didn’t leave his side for a second. I could not help but look at these gems and think – gee what a prize that lady just saved from his consequences so he can be free to hurt her again!
On the other hand, I was there to see my case through. Having procured a final protection order from the county seat a few months back after the Judge found him guilty of terroristic threats, I was surprised to learn another county division downgraded the threat to kill case to a simple harassment and sent it back to Lodi to be heard. Funny no one spoke to me about that to be sure I wouldn’t drop the charges – or to be sure how much danger I was in. Did they think a protection order would keep me alive from a lunatic? In any case I was blindsided by that move but I proceeded to trial.
The defendant, my son, was found guilty but because the charge was downgraded he got what amounted to a slap on the wrist and a minimal fine compared to the seriousness of the crime he should have been found guilty of. The judge could only find him guilty of the charges before her and no more.
Downgrading a threat to kill to simple harassment is a serious injustice against me by the county. I did not get my day in court- and if anything happens to me – it is blood on their hands. I did not drop charges – I followed through – the county let me down. This is the reason 4-5 women a day are found dead in the USA- even when they don’t drop the charges and they are willing to show up – they do not get the justice and protection they deserve. Wake up America- a protection order is not a guarantee on saving a life!

Debbie Wasserman-Schultz: Are you ready to party- or are you ready to rumble- this is after-all a war on women?

BettyJean Downing- Kling

Ladies are you ready to fight this war against us? Some of our opponents are other women! Perhaps instead of fighting with them we should talk. 

Debbie Wasserman-Schultz is fighting for a job and her political life- but it is up to American’s women us to fight for our own lives- shall we fight for Debbie’s Job and future or our own?

Before you make up your mind- I urge you to read two books by amazing women who were there when the REAL “War against women” began! I was there and so were millions of women who were forced to sit down and shut up. But our time has come. Gigi Gaston along with Bettina Sofia Viviano, who started her own film production company in 1990 after serving as vice president of production for Steven Spielberg’s Amblin Entertainment made a documentary called “ We will not be silenced” http://wewillnotbesilenced2008.com/index.htm

Michelle Thomas who said she received death threats as she gathered the 300 signed and notarized petitions required by Democratic National Convention rules to prompt a count of votes for Hillary Clinton on the first ballot, has just released an astonishing statement that I personally witnessed : “Obama thugs history revealed in Michele Thomas Bettina Viviano interview, Obama stole 1996 Alice Palmer election and 2008 DNC primaries caucuses another documentary. http://citizenwells.wordpress.com/2012/04/09/obama-thugs-history-revealed-in-michele-thomas-bettina-viviano-interview-obama-stole-1996-alice-palmer-election-and-2008-dnc-primaries-caucuses/

Thousands of us are blogging and interviewing each other. Weeks ago I asked, What Republican war on Women? https://freemenow.wordpress.com/2012/03/15/what-republican-war-on-women/

 On Monday I interviewed Anita Finlay on her new book Dirty Words On Clean Skin: Sexism and Sabotage, a Hillary Supporter’s Rude Awakening, here it here:
http://www.blogtalkradio.com/freemenow/2012/04/10/the-majority-united

Women are beginning to author books on the “War on Women” admitting it exists but bringing the evidence to prove it is not a Republican war waged this election cycle, but the pattern of behavior launched against women every election year by both the Democrats and the Republicans in an effort to use women  for their votes.

The following two books,  Admit The Horse – PG Abeles and  Dirty Words On Clean Skin: Sexism and Sabotage, a Hillary Supporter’s Rude Awakening – Anita Finlay speak specifically to the all out assault waged by the Democrats during the primary elections back in 2008 when a woman had the audacity to actually try to run for the highest office in the land. I have written blogs about this woman hating phenomenon and now women are writing books, finally unafraid to speak out.
I reviewed both books thus:

This review is from: Admit The Horse (Paperback)

In 2008, Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama waged an epic battle for the presidential nomination, but was it really a fair fight? The media told the mythical version of a dark horse coming from behind to win the race but Paulie Abeles opens our minds to an alternate narrative.
Perhaps those who wander down the yellow brick road may one day have the courage to pull the curtain back questioning who or what power was really behind the so-called magic of 2008 but those of us who worked the front lines know all to well it was plain old smoke and mirrors concealing the fraud and intimidation of the twenty-first century’s “War on Women”.
“Admit the Horse”, to those of us who lived it, is not a work of fiction at all- it is a factual account of the `war on women’ launched during the 2008 primary by the DNC, the left wing media and the pundits who rely on the political machines that run the land of the free and the home of the brave.

This review is from: Dirty Words On Clean Skin: Sexism and Sabotage, a Hillary Supporter’s Rude Awakening (Paperback)

 Up to now we’ve essentially heard from male authors writing from a male perspective. Dirty Words on Clean Skin, with courage and conviction, recounts the experiences that launched the REAL “War on Women.” Finally, after four years of silence, I am heartened that this woman author is coming forward to expose the truth as we actually endured it. This book is written by one who speaks for millions. Hat’s off to Anita Finlay and thank you for misbehaving! – Well-Behaved Women Seldom Make History~ Laurel Thatcher Ulrich

Both are a must read.

Judge DeAvila-Silebi gives a piece of peace to aggrieved survivors

By: Dara Carlin, M.A.
Cross Posted from: Honolulu Domestic Violence & Abuse Examiner

Vindicator: (noun) from the word “vindicate” (from www.yourdictionary.com)

1. 1.       to clear from criticism, blame, guilt, suspicion, etc.; uphold by evidence or argument
2. 2.       to defend or maintain (a cause, claim, etc.) against opposition
3. 3.       to serve as justification for; justify

Vindicator: the perfect word to describe The Honorable Liliana S. DeAvila-Silebi, who, today handed down her sentence regarding the 2008 shooting of Louisa Rodas, who was caring for her cancer-stricken sister, Denise, when the gunman – her sister’s husband – shot her in the head, believing her to be his mother-in-law, BettyJean Kling. http://www.northjersey.com/news/crime_courts/032312_Lodi_man_gets_30_years_for_shooting_sister-in-law_in_the_face.html

Considering the gravity of the crime and its consequences it’s hard to imagine that the gunman would get anything less than the maximum but – as many domestic violence survivors can attest to – in light of the family context of the case, justice is something that’s never quite given as much weight as healing, forgiveness, “moving beyond” and conflict resolution so the cause for doubt and concern was warranted.  Justice was served, however, with the gunman being sentenced to 30 years and ordered to pay $100,000 in restitution.

Video: DV survivors are more accustomed to this

I heard from BettyJean following the sentencing (who couldn’t say enough about Judge DeAvila-Silebi) and asked her a few questions about how it all went.

Continue reading on Examiner.com Judge DeAvila-Silebi gives a piece of peace to aggrieved survivors – Honolulu Domestic Violence & Abuse | Examiner.com
http://www.examiner.com/domestic-violence-abuse-in-honolulu/judge-deavila-silebi-gives-a-piece-of-peace-to-aggrieved-survivors#ixzz1qKJwk5XT

Modern-day Mengele may be experimenting on daughter in D. C.

By:  Jocelyn Andersen

Life-saving treatment is being deliberately withheld from nine year old Ariana-Leilani, and a petition demanding that she receive immediate medical treatment is currently being circulated.

In a BlogTalkRadio interview, conducted yesterday by Betty Jean Kling, Ariana-Leilani’s mother, Dr. Ariel King, and her attorney, Roy Morris, disclosed that they believed Ariana-Leilani’s father, Dr. Michael Pfeiffer, was not only refusing to allow his daughter to receive life saving medicine but, for unknown reasons, might also be deliberately causing the very condition that is threatening her life.

Ariana-Leilani is a dual German-American citizen who resides in Washington D.C. with her father, who is a German citizen employed by the V. A. hospital there. The child is allowed no contact with her mother or her mother’s family. She has been diagnosed with a life-threatening but easily treatable disease called, Severe Chronic Neutropenia, but though the medicine for her disease is covered by insurance and is even being made available free of charge, her father refuses to allow her to receive the treatments she needs.

A simple infection could easily kill her.

Neutropenia is not contracted naturally. The disease is a common side effect of some chemotherapy drugs, but cancer has been ruled out in Ariana-Leilani’s case, as have most other common causes. King says, “We believe it [testing] will show that it is an induced condition. You don’t get it [neutropenia] out of no where.”

One routine, and very simple, step in the testing process has been neglected—not overlooked—but overtly neglected. Toxicology testing is routine in cases of neutropenia in order to rule out drug induced neutropenia.

Morris commented that every professional who looks at the case asks why toxicology testing has not been done. In fact, toxicology testing has been requested on numerous occasions by Ariana-Leilani’s mother, but the father refuses to have her tested.

There is a history of control and abuse issues within the marriage. King has filed restraining orders against her husband who was able to have them removed via ex parte hearings. She and her husband are currently estranged with divorce proceedings pending in Germany. King currently resides in Germany. She stated that she constantly fears for her life, and in order to help her daughter she must keep herself alive.

Gender bias in family court and old fashioned cronyism appear to be playing dual parts in Ariana-Leilani’s dilemma. Dr. King maintains that her daughter’s physician is a colleague of Pfeiffer’s and refuses to heed her requests to prescribe medicine or to order toxicology testing.

The German Embassy issued a request, to Pfeiffer, that a second opinion be gained and offered to pay for that along with independent testing for Ariana-Leilani. Pfeiffer refuses to comply with his embassy’s request.

King reports that, “Something is destroying the neutrophils in Ariana-Leilani’s body. Tests have shown that she is making enough, but something is destroying them.”  

Toxicology testing would rule out drug induced disease in this child.

During last night’s interview, Betty Jean Kling asked “What kind of father would refuse a second opinion or free medicine for his daughter?”  Kling concluded that only a father “with something to hide” would behave in such a way. Morris, who has been advocating for Dr. King on Ariana-Leilani’s behalf pro-bono for some years, concurred. He replied that Kling’s explanation was “the best he could think of.”

A listener to the show called in to ask if Dr. King thought it was possible that her estranged husband was administering drugs to Ariana-Leilani that could be inducing this disease. King answered in the affirmative. She said, “My husband’s specialty is actually Human Drug Experimentation … when I know and understand that my husband’s specialty is Human Drug Experimentation … some of the drugs that cause neutropenia he has actually written about in his PhD thesis … do I think there is a possibility, yes I do … and it would be nice to rule that out…”

King claims to have a recording of her daughter saying, “Papa gives me green medicine to make me sick …” 

According to King, there is some question about Pfeiffer’s credentials as well. She said, “He was going to work in Florida, but they actually had to check out his medical credentials, and he didn’t want that, so he stayed in D. C..  D. C. did not give him a medical license because he could not show that he actually went to medical school, but he was able to get one in Virginia because they were told he had one in D. C., so there are a lot of issues going on here.”

Washington D. C. is one of the few areas that permits doctors to self-prescribe and to prescribe drugs for family members even though the American Medical Association condemns this practice. As repugnant as it may be to contemplate, it is possible that there is a modern-day Dr. Mengele experimenting on his very own child in Washington D.C., and nothing is being done about it.

To rule this out, Ariana-Leilani needs toxicology testing immediately.

Dr. King has written to the State Department to ask for help in getting her daughter medical treatment. Dr. David Dale , an expert on neutropenia, wrote to the German Embassy requesting their help. In addition to his many other efforts on behalf of Ariana-Leilani, Morris has written to President Obama as well. So far, all is to no avail.

Morris and King have given up on the legal system to come through for Ariana-Leilani and have turned to public opinion. They are asking everyone who will to fight with them for the life of Ariana-Leilani by signing the petition demanding that this child be helped immediately.

Time is of the essence.

 The show hosted by BettyJean Kling and  Jocelyn Andersen can be heard and downloaded to any listening device on demand: http://www.blogtalkradio.com/freemenow/2012/03/22/the-majority-united

Louisa Richardson Rodas needs your support Friday 3/23/12

BettyJean Downing –Kling

For Immediate Release:

We need to fill this courtroom, can Louisa count on your physical support Friday?

Sentencing
Friday March 23
Hackensack, NJ  Courthouse
10 main Street Room 412 1:30 PM

Honorable Liliana S. DeAvila-Silebi
Justice Center
10 Main Street
Hackensack 07601-7699

Case# 09-06-1226-I, New Jersey vs. George Hartwig Sentencing scheduled for February 24, 2012

Dear Judge DeAvila-Silebi,

    I am the mother of Denise Richardson and Louisa Richardson- Rodas. I am making this statement to you on their behalf because they cannot. Denise died in the spring of 2009 and Louisa is no longer able to speak.

    George Hartwig was married to my daughter Denise; they were together for 23 years. The marriage was marred by many acts of domestic violence on his part towards her. He was cruel and vicious to her during the relationship and marriage but for reasons a mother will never know, she kept taking him back.

    In June of 2007, Denise was at her home in Lodi. She was suffering and nearing the end of a three year battle with ovarian cancer. She was awakened to sharp blows to her head and body because Gorge Hartwig was trying to kill her. She begged for her life and she was finally able to convince him that if he stopped beating her she would give to him what he wanted the most, her pain medication.

    On December 17, 2008 George Hartwig was scheduled to go to court for the June 07 attack on Denise. On December 15, 2008 he entered 540 North Main Street, Lodi where I was caring for Denise. Denise was in the final stages of Ovarian Cancer and she weighed only 80 Lbs. George began to drag her around the living room and only stopped when I intervened in order to defray his attention away from her. He kept holding up the bloody pillow from the last time he had beaten Denise. He finally left but not before threatening to kill me with a gun.

    George returned hours later with a shotgun. Denise was sleeping and Louisa was at the very far end of the couch working on her computer. She never heard him enter, when Louisa spotted him hovering over Denise holding a shotgun, she immediately texted her son Marc for help.

    Denise awoke to hear George demanding the phone and holding a gun. Groggy, she began looking for a phone to give him then heard a shot fire. When she turned to look all she saw was George peering down at her – the gun pointed at the ceiling. She had no idea what direction the gun shot took nor where her sister was at the time. George now began pointing the gun at her and demanding her pain pills.

    Louisa had used the phone to call for help. George saw her and shot her in the face with his shotgun. My son and grandson arrived and George tried to shoot my son Tommy but the gun jammed. Marc then subdued him and the police came.

    Louisa had suffered a shot to the face and head leaving her nearly dead.

    George was lucid enough to tell the officers exactly what happened that day and night – he said that he thought Louisa was me and that I had made him very angry and he decided to come over and kill me.

    Denise died from her cancer on March 7, 2009. She never saw her sister again and she was forced to go to her death feeling responsible for marrying the guy who shot her sister.

    The court appearance scheduled for December 17, 2008 never happened. George was never required to answer for the beating he gave to Denise back in June of 2007.

    Louisa suffered severe traumatic brain injury. She currently resides at a Sate run hospital known as the Bergen Regional Medical Center (formerly Bergen Pines). She requires 24 hour care but receives only a tiny fraction of the care she needs. So much of her care depends on me. Louisa is a young woman who deserves to be in a happy and caring atmosphere attended to by care takers and by doctors who actually examine her and prescribe with expectations of quality of life.

This long term care facility hospital is far from that. Louisa’s injuries rendered her physically helpless and mentally incompetent but not oblivious or comatose. During this time she has been subjected to continuous acts of negligent medical treatment, physical abuse and personal neglect at the hands of management, nursing and support staff. Specifically, Louisa suffered from severe rashes, infections and other ailments the facility completely failed to reasonably treat or attend at all. On numerous occasions BMC completely neglected Louisa in that she was forced to lie in her own feces for extended lengths of time without proper nursing assistance. Louisa has often exhibited signs of bruising and various other traumas to her body, face and hands without explanation. Louisa is denied daily ear, eye, nose and mouth care. Finally, Louisa has been denied appropriate medical attention when she becomes ill and needs special care she also has been denied physical, occupational and speech therapy. Instead she is merely warehoused as if she were an unfeeling vegetable. Louisa is well aware of these wretched conditions and her untenable situation and feels pain and discomfort and she is able to clearly express this hurt and distress.

    For all intents and purposes, her life has been taken away from her. Louisa remains incapacitated for life which should be another 40 years.  While there may ultimately be a light at the end of George Hartwig’s tunnel, there is none for my daughter and her family. We will sleep with one eye open at best, knowing that she needs constant care and attention. I worry constantly over the fact that the day will come when I cannot care for her. And then, what will we do?

    This man, for no good reason bullied and battered two innocent young women and if he had his way, he would have killed my son and me. There can never be justice for my daughters and my family; nevertheless, I ask Your Honor to do the best that the law permits in punishing this man for his evil acts.

    I further ask to court to order him to pay restitution to my daughter Louisa for the extensive medical care she has incurred and will need in the future. I have been told that George Hartwig settled a civil lawsuit and received a substantial amount of money. I request that the Court make inquiry into his assets and any disposition he made of them over the period of time since he attacked my daughters over three years ago.

“How do you pick up the threads of an old life? How do you go on, when in your heart you begin to understand: there is no going back? There are some things that time cannot mend; some hurts that go too deep, that have taken hold.” –Lord of the Rings: Return of the King

J. R. R. Tolkien has the talent for putting thoughts into words that I, as her representative and that of her children cannot. How could I possibly put into words our journey and all the events that brought us to where we are today? These past three years, I have asked myself, “What does the human spirit need in order to heal and move on?”

I have settled on the following: We need a safe place to share our pain and be acknowledged, we need compassion, we need to know that we and others will be protected from the perpetrator, we need accountability — someone who will hold the perpetrator accountable, we need restitution for the losses incurred by the victim, and we need justice (not revenge) but vindication — to be set free. Scars remain, but healing is sufficient so as not to continue to be held in bondage to the trauma.

I am attaching photos of my daughters. They are self-explanatory and substantiate and support the information I report to you herein.

I thank you for Louisa, and her sons Marc and Josh Richardson and our family for the opportunity to be heard in this matter,

Betty Jean Downing- Kling

Are you a Feminist?

BettyJean Downing Kling

Are you a feminist? To many this sounds like a silly question, and some might respond with a statement like; “Well Yeah! If not a feminist, what does that make me? A misogynist (having a hatred of women, as a defined group)?”

Men and women alike call themselves feminists believing the term refers to respecting females and believing them equal and capable deserving the same opportunities as men. And yet describe yourself as a feminist and there is a good chance your will be misjudged!

Feminism comes with a lot more negativism than it deserves. Unfortunately not everyone has a positive opinion of the term or for what the movement accomplished for women and girls. In order to undermine the feminist movement a great number of negative stereotypes have been perpetuated; such as the man-haters, ugly, lonely, barren, angry woman who is a feminist only because she cannot find or keep a man etc. etc.

These stereotypes are intentional propaganda, plain gibberish, served up to give the so called “post-feminist” generations pause about self-identifying as feminists. Instead are we to be ashamed our foremothers fought for the right to vote and are still fighting for equality under the laws?

I suggest films like “Feminist: Stories from the Women’s Liberation Movement” are very important and serve to correct the history of women’s history and struggles. This independent film, made by Jennifer Lee (@JenniferLeeUSA) documents some significant events of the Women’s Liberation Movement of the 1960′s and 1970′s and reminds us of the positive changes which addressed the legal and economic obstacles facing women.

Men and women worked together to tackle issues of working women, gender roles, salary, and opportunities of women in the workforce . It is important that we tell the whole story, correct the lies instead of focusing on Bra-burning for example, which became associated with the movement, but the term is a misnomer as no bras were actually burned at the Miss America protest.

“Feminist: Stories from the Women’s Liberation Movement.” 

Why are people reluctant to call themselves a “feminist”? Why aren’t we proud of what the Women’s Liberation Movement of the 1960s and the 1970s did for us?  I am making this documentary film about the significant events of the Women’s Liberation Movement so that we can remember why we’re proud of the word “feminist.”  I have traveled all across the United States and interviewed over 30 feminists who participated in the Women’s Liberation Movement – including some famous faces. The Women’s Liberation Movement was a momentous time in our history – when you see these feminists tell their stories, you will be proud to call yourself a feminist.

Why is this film important?

The fight for equality is not over. For example, today only 17% of our congress is female with only six female governors. In order to move forward and truly have equality we must embrace our history. Rejecting the word “feminist” holds us back. Hearing and seeing the stories of what these women did when they were college students during the Anti-War and Civil Rights Movements will show us how to move forward.

As a mother, it’s important to me that my child knows the history of women in the United States. Women have a rich history full of dramatic stories, tough fights, and huge successes. In order to create equality for women in the United States, we must honor the work done during the Women’s Liberation Movement.

I completed all of the interviews with my own money. The cinematographers who shot the interviews did so for free. This film is a labor of love for all of us. ~Jennifer Lee

Sexualizing our Society 1

BettyJean Downing Kling
Adapted from Sexualizing America Part1 originally Publihed 2007

SEX SELLS? 
It sure does that’s why they do it! But who is doing all the buying?

Seems to me most of the sex selling is selling women and girls as objects to be used and abused by men and you would think that it appeasl mosts to men BUT, since women do most of the buying –  please explain to me why women are buying? How is selling women and girls as objects a benefit to our women? Why are our women buying the very items that lend themselves to our demise? The very items that make men rich while they demean us? Think not- think again! Stick with me over the course of my photo essay and I will unfold how they have and continue to escallate this insideous and not so secret offensive against the femle population in our society and thereby poison the the children from birth to have a skewed view of a hypersexualalized America.

Think I am exaggerating- I am going to bring you the proof! For 35 years I have harped now I am going to bring you physical proof, seeing is believing! This is what we are force feeding our children from birth. Both male and female are being normalized to believe what their lying eyes tell them about females based on what we project before them with what we wear and allow them to see as normal. Oh its normal alright and so is the resulting reprecussions of violence and abuse to our femle population now. Is this what we wanted?

Stay tuned for all 12 parts of this photo essay. Add to these images, TV programming and today’s music lyrics, peer pressure and a variety of other input that children are bombarded with from birth and you have a total picture of what they know as a sexualized and sometimes violent society.

 

In a society where media is the most persuasive force shaping cultural norms, the collective message that our young women and men overwhelmingly receive is that a woman’s value and power lie in her youth, beauty, and sexuality, and not in her capacity as a leader. While women have made great strides in leadership over the past few decades, the United States is still 90th in the world for women in national legislatures, women hold only 3% of clout positions in mainstream media, and 65% of women and girls have disordered eating behaviors. http://missrepresentation.org/the-film/

Just as the women under Shar’ia law accept their fate to be lower than dogs and their men believe they are the slave masters without question- we in America are conditioning our children to believe females are sexual objects and prey, rather than equals and males are sexual predators/dominators rather than equals.

So sex sells- somebody is buying it folks and it is up to us to put them out of the business of selling these ideas to our baby girls and boys!

By the way have you seen these gifts for kids: Tattoos for baby boys and Baby Stiletto’s for baby girls! Had enough yet?

Although many think that the shoes are just too cute, others believe they are hideous. Some people believe that putting high heels on a baby is perverted and will rob them of their innocence. Hayden Porter responded with,” A 3-month old baby has no idea she’s wearing high heels.”

To which I respond- every pedophile in town will enjoy the baby in stilettos! Let’s just put them on at birth and let’s make G-String diapers while we are at it – maybe tampon diapers too? Damned idiots!

Dereon Girls Ad Too Adult

Beyonce has gone too far- is she and her adult girl want to look like hookers – well that is one thing but dressing this little girls like this – it’s over the top! http://community.livejournal.com/ohnotheydidnt/23284914.html

All they are missing is a POLE because they are truly strippers in the making- where are their mothers? The same place most of our mothers are- with their heads in the sand while all this has been happening right under our noses. Check the clothes on your daughters and their friends – do it now! 

And now for the photo essay:

These first 7 photos represent 3 from Abercrombie and Fitch using models that appear to be under aged followed by  4 on ageism which shows a contrast between the supposed sexiness of the very very young and supposed used up- over the hill unattractiveness of older women. In my opinion this not only pushes sex while you are very young, it also leads to eating disorders, depression and poor self esteem and self image. It is disparaging and insulting to older woman not to mention disrespectful.

She- prey/submissive abused/sexy. They- strong/predators/sexualizing/abusing

She- prey/submissive abused/sexualized ganged on. They- strong/predators/sexualizing/ganging on

Every boys dream (he looks 14), a blond and a brunette – one on each arm to meet his every need. After all what else are they for? So tell me what item of clothing are they selling here anyway?

Now that we’ve learned what young girls are for let’s see what happens when they age?

You do not want to look like- or act like or listen to a MOTHER do you?

Either a young sex kitten or an old bag- one or the other – only two choices for women!

Young and sexy or a disrespected ugly old bag

Is it any wonder women feel depressed when they are marketed to and purchase from manufacturers who insult them? AND the damned fools keep buying from them! Why? An old bag you can actually love? What a damned insult! Keisel should be drummed out of business tomorrow!

Please send in any ads you find offensive and add to our collection.

The Domestic Violence Empire; Billion dollar industry in need of reform

 

Maria DiBari | Like TCCC on Facebook

 

Since the enactment of the Violence Against Women Act (VAWA) in 1994, the federal government has channeled over a billion dollars into organizations that are required to provide assistance to victims of domestic violence. The VAWA Web site does post figures on grants awarded to specific organizations and the amount of each grant, but does not detail how the funds are expected to be spent. Womensenews, Regina Varoilli.

 

The goal of the domestic violence reform movement is to ensure that all victims are afforded equal protections and services regardless of race, gender, sexual orientation, age and their perpetrator’s occupation. Victim resources and public policy must provide services and laws that address the needs of all victims including: women, men, teens, LGBT, officer-involved victims as well as immigrants so equal protections and services for all.

 

Currently, victims of violence on a local, state and national level are being failed by our funded resources.  The problem is that domestic violence shelters and agencies get funding based on the need for services and the number of hotline calls or heads in the shelter, not the cases they solve or the needs they meet.  You or I may call the shelter with a question, and that is then counted as a statistic for their agency.  Whether they help you or I or not, we both become a statistic for the agency and in turn, the agency will get rewarded with funding and grants. 

 

The most effective way to approach the reform issue is to spearhead this movement at the local and state level, while simultaneously gaining national support.  Our local and state resources are flawed and victims are unable to obtain appropriate services from shelters and agencies.  Some problems with the current support system include:

 

1. Crime victim’s compensation is difficult to obtain for domestic violence related injuries.  Emergency relocation is nearly impossible to obtain due to the lengthy application process and documentation required to proceed with the request; providing an emergency service should be a fast process, not one that takes weeks to complete with the risk of being denied services. 
   
2. Pro bono legal representation for divorce and family law cases are lacking. 
   
3. Pro bono surgeries after domestic violence are difficult to access for victims.
   
4. Career services for victims of domestic violence is a needed resource that should be provided by all shelters.  Helping women re-enter the work place and teaching victims how to be financially independent is vital. 
   
5. Transitional Housing is in high demand for victims of domestic violence. 
   
6. Victim transportation to court, case related appointments and to and from work while residing in a shelter is needed for all victims to maintain stability, financial independence, and make necessary appointments. 
   
7. Stalking resources are non-existent in every shelter.    
   

 

The list goes on; however, these are the most immediate resources that need to be addressed on a national level.

 

 A lack of funding for domestic violence is not the problem.  Many DV executives are making six figure salaries and beyond, and work 35 hour weeks.  Safe Horizon, the richest shelter in the US located in NYC, gets nearly 42 million dollars per year, while less than 1 million dollars is allocated towards direct services for victims in 5 boroughs. The top executives at Safe Horizon make hundreds of thousands of dollars each year with bonuses of 50K per year.  Even at the local level, executives running the county shelters make top salaries to serve a small population, and even then, many victims are being left behind.  There is nothing wrong with getting paid for a job well done and hard work, but getting rewarded while victims’ needs go unmet and while domestic homicide is on the rise is illogical. 

 

Each year, Mary Kay donates millions to the NNEDV, and this is not surprising since a Mary Kay representative sits on their Board.  This agency does not provide direct services to victims at any capacity.  How do I know that? I was denied services and support by the NNEDV as a victim in need of resources, and I am not the only one.  One of their missions is to empower victims of DV.  I was never empowered by this group.  The NNEDV did provide a victims fund “Amy’s Courage Fund”, which was sponsored by the Mary Kay Foundation, but that fund has closed because the resources were in high demand and the funds were exhausted.  This is a clear example of what victims need most: emergency funds for survival. 

 

In fact, many large corporations sponsor local shelters and national coalitions and agencies each year.  Many sponsors rely on statistics provided by the agencies and truly believe that victims are getting the services they need and are benefiting.  The reality is not as bright as the statistics portray, and, instead, many go without, find it impossible to get help, are denied shelter and services, and even die trying to get assistance. 

 

“Funding needs to be reallocated to lawyers and trained consultants that work one on one with victims of domestic violence, and provide follow-up on cases to ensure needs are met.  National, state and local domestic violence agencies need to be held accountable through proper oversight, which does not exist today.  Follow-up is poor, training is lacking and there are no incentives for agencies to provide victim services throughout the entire victimization cycle” Alexis Moore, Director of Victim Outreach for Tri-County Crisis Center, Inc.

 

Victims need real services.  The most critical point in any given victimization cycle is the point at which the victim picks up the phone and reaches out for help.  At that point it is critical for the victim in need to have access to direct services such as pro bono representation, career services, counseling, emergency funds, housing and shelter, transportation and basic necessities.  Without these services, victims are lost and are unable to survive the cycle of violence.  Without proper follow-up and attention, victims fall between the cracks and are put at risk.  These problems can be solved and should be tackled at the local and state level first, and then the movement must continue nationally with the support of organizations and individuals such as National NOW, NCADV, NNEDV and public officials. 

 

Maria DiBari | Like TCCC on Facebook

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Ode to my Pop: Roy Downing A WWII Aviator

I lost my 90 year old dad this year; my mother lost her partner of 65 years. The picture above was my favorite since I was a very little girl, I remember looking at it and thinking – My daddy is a hero! I was too young to know how much of a hero he was. I never knew until later in life the secrets he held inside.

Pop was blown out of the air and captured and held in a Concentration Camp during WW11. A strapping young man over 6 feet tall he was a lightweight boxer before he entered the Army Air corps. After escaping the Camp, when found by our side and told the war was over, he weighed 90 Lbs.

 My pop suffered PTSD as you can imagine from being held in the camps and seeing what he saw. His wounds from being shot out of the sky  nor those from being shot when he barley stayed alive after escaping, compared to the scars of all he witnessed during the war.

Before he died he began to tell stories of the horrors of the war and of the mass murders in the camps. I once saw the tears in his eyes as he watched some film clips of the war toward the end of his life.

 Pop was adopted and had a hard life on Missouri farm with a very strict father who beat him regularly. He escaped the farm as a young boy and traveled the railways like a hobo finally joining the service which became his only family. When he returned as a highly decorated war hero for saving the lives of several men before they were captured, his natural mother heard about him and called him.

Delighted he ran to her only to find when he arrived, she was drunk and already forgot he even existed. She had run off and remarried to a very rich man after her former husband died leaving the baby and his brother and sister orphans. Now rich, she found and raised the older ones but the baby having been adopted then ran away from home she lost track of.

Roy tried to fit in but he could not be anything other than rough around the edges, he was not brought up refined and with money. He was treated more like the help and his pride prompted him to walk away rather than be humiliated.

 He came east and met and married my mother Louise Bonetti an Italian whose family nearly rubbed him out. They didn’t and he made my mother very happy, he treated her like a queen right to the end. She never wanted for anything and they traveled the world and were like two peas in a pod.  I am not qualified to explain their relationship perhaps mom will comment here and do that for me. They shared 65 years and only one child.

After all Pop went through , I can’t say he had any frame of reference how to be a cuddly parent, he was strict, he beat and he punished me a lot. I think had I been a boy, we either would have got along better or he would have killed me.  He provided for me and without any experience on how to love a child he did the best he could and I realize that no malice was intended. He gave me wonderful things never realizing what I needed most was nothing more than his love and to be the Apple of his eye – ‘daddy’s little girl’.

 Men in general can’t express the effects of PTSD nor were the effects known or acknowledged until recently. Pop was a war hero- he wasn’t supposed to show weakness, he was supposed to be strong and lead with an iron fist and so he did.

At his deathbed he pretty much realized he could have done better by me and tried to heal that which was rough between us. I was not about to deny him. I will never know, but I do know that I held him and loved him and comforted him right to the end. I did him the honor of helping him leave with the dignity this war hero deserved and when he passed this year in the veterans hospital he died as my hero and finally he let me know that I was “daddy’s little girl.”

 This Veterans Day, as I look at this picture, a box full of medals, a flag the Air Force gave me at the funeral and cry- I need to be honest about all the mixed feelings I have for this man. I have both loved and hated and loved again. This man was my pop Roy Downing, an orphan, a son, a father, a husband and to be remembered today as a soldier who risked his life and limb for our country and who until his death volunteered selfishly for our country as Chairman of the American Reform Party. 

A SOLDIER’S PRAYER
Dear Lord
Please let me have regular dreams like others do
Not these nightmares of memory
Let my dreams be filled with light and joy
Not smoke and terror
Let me hear the laughter of children
Not the screams of men dying
Let the birds fill the air with song
Not the sounds of bombs and bullets
Let the rivers run pure and clear
Not red with blood
Let everyone be healthy and whole
Not missing limbs and faces
Let the earth look as you made it
Not scorched and cratered
Let me wake up smiling
Not searching for the enemy
Let the sweat on my pillow be from summer’s heat
Not the sweat of fear and anxiety
but dear Lord most of all
I beg you
Please don’t let my children or their children
pray to you as I am doing tonight
Amen

Written by Maria Sutherland
September 16, 1999

George Hartwig admits to firing shotgun into sister-in-law’s face

 I need support. My son-in -law George Hartwig,  bludgeoned his estranged wife, my dying daughter Denise Richardson in the head before she died of cancer then returned  and shot my other daughter Louisa Richardson Rodas  nearly killing her. He tried to kill my son but the gun jammed before he was taken down by my grandson and subdued until the police came.

He pleaded guilty yesterday to 8 counts and threw himself on the mercy of the court asking for a minimal sentence based on his incapacited condition of drug induced actions. Instead of consecutive sentences of 60 + years he wants 20  which will have him out in about 12 years.  My daughter will serve about 40 – she is permanently in solitary confinement having lost half of her head from the shotgun blast. She remains completely healthy except she cannot sit, stand, speak, see, eat, or recognize her own children. She will live a long life of nothing! Why should he get less? He has had a long life of creating misery for everyone who has ever come in his path.

Please consider how you might help by wring a short respectful letter to the judge regarding plea deals and how women pay the ultimate price for lower that full sentencing. We urge significant and effective sentences, we must eliminate or reduce plea deals and strictly enforce laws for Violence against Women. We ask she do so in this case as George is a repeat offender and his pleas are just another con job on the court.

The Judge Liliana DeAvila-Silebi is a fair jurist, please send respectful letters of support for full and consecutive sentencing regardless of the prosecutors request for 30 years in return for a plea deal. The defendant has always wanted to plead guilty and was not in need of a plea deal ! He did not accept the conditions of the plea deal therefore it is not incumbamt on this Judge to give him the 30 years – she can and should give him consecutive sentencing.

http://www.northjersey.com/news/HARTWIG.html Comments would be appreciated in support of full and consecutive sentencing.